Summer of the ´17

With influensa on the rise and sun buried somewhere under grey cotton for heaven today, looking back on travel memories up the end of summer/fall is like a warm cup in your hands 🙂 gets you warm from the inside.

No you know what…
I had just one heck of a wonderful year in 2017!!!

Step once look twice

The first day at home started with a bone chilling fight. That would be me in pygamas trying to open a frozen door from the garden, to get to the car and check tire dimensions. Hurrying not only for -5C that my airy home pants welcomed more than my own legs, but also for car workshop waiting in the phone. I mean, why check the dimensions before calling? That would be smart, and that is not allowed in a fluffy warm blanket, in a lazy sunny freezing morning. Right?

Checking on the tires I realize one is nearly bold (front left: yeah, what do you think? Carry a precious weight for driver for the last 10000 km) and one is actually year round. So okay, if stopped by police I get one tire (60 euro) less in fine. Hmmmm… Nä. And the national-wise hunt for winter rims&tires for my bug for a car continues. In the end a set of both is found on a 2 days delivery distance and 500 euro price tag. Hm. Well it is a choice with no choice really ))) What is the price of freedom against its value?? 🙂 and kaching!: the set is eventually on its way.

Sitting by the kitchen table (where else you get strategically close to coffee machine) with the computer and phone, I suddenly realize I am not alone in the kitchen. The sound of quirk-quirk music hits through silence together with another chilling memory of 2 months floor-less kitchen last winter, when field mice seeked warmth (hard to blame, I’d do the same)) in the house and organized thier private water supply by chewing on the howes to a dish washer (that I would probably pass). Last winter, squirking under the sink turned into squirking on(of) the floor when the water level underneath got high enough. We fill the dishwasher twice a day, it didn’t take long… So, with this colourfu picture in my head, I got to search for a screwdriver…

No I know where my tools lay in the house okay. I just don’t know why the repairing company last winter, had to use plastic howes again, and even expecting more occasions of inspection, then screw the floor of the sink closet underneath all the rest of equipment???? I need to be a freaking plomber to get all this shit out and in again!!! A moisturemeter, whatever the right name is. A moisturemeter, mousetrap and a cup of coffee. Yepp. And the screwdriver goes back to its idle. Together with the screws: what’s the point? The floor sits tighter than a virginity belt on a crusader’s girlfriend.

Back to the phone. My old blind dogs morning toilet, there were flakes of blod in urine. Sorry for details. I don’t know if I would rather not learn them, either. I don’t know what I am craving less for now, put on hold on the phone: to get the bill for the veterinar investigation (around 300 euro, kaching!!) or to learn the diagnosis. To hear vet’s honest recommendation or to take the decision… Even if I want to keep calling or not. I don’t know.

No time available until next week. Am I more worried or relieved? I don’t know…

BZEEP! A message. From the handy man hired to fix the water communications in the old ghost house I got as a side project. After faults in the installation that costed a neat and round 1000 euro, I asked him to stay away and wait until I get back. ”I changed the pipes!” – a happy message. He is a nice person actually. ”You did WHAT???” …no answer.

Breathe. One. Two. Three. Four.

Meeting with the bank went fast. My company account is now closed, all services and credit cards are cancelled. Stearing at the finalizing paper from the tax authority, a sudden vivid memory came up: sitting with a bright soul close friend of mine on the day he had to announce his company bancrupt, one year and a month ago. It eas heavy but it was a new beginning; we would go sailing around the world, we agreed. A week later he was sitting on the corner of my hospital bed counting needles in my arm, talking sence into my foggy head about how I should take care of myself. And a week later he himself was gone. Just like… snap. One year and a week ago. He went sailing alone I guess. Maybe it is good we didn’t have a chance to say goodbye and he didn’t ask if I want to follow with. I don’t know.

Even in fase with my senses, it feels so heavy. Serenity, freedom and happiness moments of the last month seem to be compensated against present concerns by unfair exchange rate. One more distant memory from my childhood popped up (is it some kind of freaking memory geizer today???), of me being affraid to be happy. Because each truly joyful moment would be followed by tripple amount of tears: the rule that has proven itself. It wasn’t worth it to allow myself to be happy, it cost too much. God I wish I could forget this now!!

The last jacket of three I bought on my North Cape journey got zipper broken during my regular night walk with the dog as the last accord of the day. In old fairy tales, maid would need to wear out three pairs of iron shoes to get to her destiny, does zipper count in modern interpretation? ) It is time, it is time…

I left my heart in Istanbul

  1. Today leaving the city that has vibrant energy and colours landed on shapes and interactions; a wispering story behind each piece of patterned tiles hidden in garbage and bushes, an equal strong and quick answer to each message you leave here, in Istanbul.  This time, my regular globetrottermood: no sightseeing whatsoever, only experiences: sun, sounds, colours, energies, people, small tasks, languages, tastes. Oh and languages is something that is served as a local specialty here: feeling of crossborder unity has never been stronger than while a conversation about matrimonial experience, taken in a mix of English (as a minority), French, Turkish, Swedish, Russian and Arabic, all between same two persons.  
  2. The thing I am not going to miss when back in Sweden, is a constant  background of polis/pray megaphones. I met people who were kind, proud, strong, ambitios, caring, aware, helpful, joyful, tricky, inventive, curious, active and mindfull. The level of entrepreneurial energy doesn’t seem to change since Ottoman empire,either. With that ball of fire that the soul of the nation is, any restrains: political as religios, seem to be ridiculous and serving any other interests than country’s; and therefore even more sad you become as you think about the development of events in recent years. 
  3. Every time I come back here, there is a glimpse of fear in my heart: what if this will be the time when the balance needs to be restored and instead of excitement, dissappointment comes up? What if one day I return striving for historical and cultural autenthicy but find nothing else than slogans on ruins wrapped in plastic and Insta-filters? Well… if this city, this meeting point between Europe and Asia, will perish for brainwashing and money goules,  maybe there is not much left to save your heart for; the Dark Ages will officially arrive and that I will certainly not be able to live through, anyway. So I lean on providence, hope for the best of human nature and I leave now, I leave my heart in Istanbul 🙂

Istanbul: the last breath of history trying to learn us something…

All mixed in this city: old and new, strong and soft, muslim and ortodox, freedom and pressure… I don’t know another place where I feel as much home as here, the place where none language sounds foreign, and all cultures of Europe have some root or brunch. If I ever go looking for the tree of the eternity, I will be here.  I was not born here but you are in my blod, Istanbul.

 

Going home from North, 23/6 afternoon

Taking the same route home is fun because it helps to recollect and live again through funny moments, like this one. Great name for a lake: Resposibility. Here I shared a midsommar dinner with a group of local fishermen. Passing by the lake, I did see theit boat, but it was a bit too far, I was a bit in a hurry 🙂

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I did take my time with the forest though 🙂 Silence, humidity, smells and textures…. Excitement 🙂

Well, yes… way back home was kinda another story. The rain, not-at-all-summer cold, road maintainance… It was like the decompression camera, turning me back to reality so that my blood would not boil and kill me.

As the evening was falling down there was once again, time to look for a calm place to stop. …Don’t know how manny more kilometres I drove just fascinated by the views, before I had to admit I was exhausted. And before I found the spot which was NOT a private garden ))) One of beautiful sights of Sweden, close to a metropolis, you know…

 

 

Coming home fromNorth Cape: What is looking on pics from summer journey, a half year after?

Okay ))) The first morning of the last day with the midnight sun started with a healthy consideration: why on earth am I in the middle of the forest, sank in the moss and squeezed between the trees? Charmed  by the altitude transition, this reaction would be the first sign of awakening… Good I guess! But you can’t help the feeling that the magic is running out. Awakening. 20150623_114213

Stopped for shopping in Pajala, and god knows what made me drive up to the wooden church I saw on the GPS. It appeared to be a place of a bit of a special story, the preacher Lars Laestadius realm. A man was passionate about folks quit drinking and get to their families insted. A great example of that good retorics and prescribed roles make miracles  quite torn away from the reality: he himself was mostly away and hunting och picking flowers, while his own wife was struggling with the death of every second child she gave birth to (and they had 7 who survived, do the math), accepting people who came for healing – and making the very medicins out of the herbs she had around.

The story of an outstanding effort and result where women’s part is kinda… lost. No wonders it was knocking in the house before my visit, scaring poor guides – young girls, doing their summer jobs in the old house-museum. Behind the stories of social changes and great success, there are stories of sorrow that must be outspoken.

So what we have here, is the memory that people paid to the couple, preacher and his wife. Oh, and he got a bronze bust as well, on the hill by the house.

Wet through shoes and back to my well dust car 🙂 yes, keep the distance on the parking! Or you’ll share the roads I’ve gone, quite literary.

 

Pure. allegory. of choice. and freedom. (Pick&Mix as you wish).

 

First time I sat behind the steering wheel of a SUV, I didn’t feel any difference really. Well, it didn’t go as fast as the rest of the cars could, and it took a bit more excercise to get into it, then in most of the other cars. And it also took some time to get the point with extra gears as well… What a misery, am I on the wrong place? But it felt right, becides, I didn’t have any other options. That old jeep was all I had to choose between.

Even to deal with our own experience, we need learning and guidance. I didn’t quite got yet what I had in my hands when I experienced a mixture of joy, relief and revenge, as I managed to get out of the blocked parking (for the 150-th time!! some folks just don’t see the problem of double parking!) by crowling over the pavement edges, stones and gras. I still thought it was a funny coincidence, happening to have a right tool for the temporary challenge.

Sometimes I peeped into the autosports pages in newspapers, filled with jealous cravings about big badass forest monsters, driving where there is no walking possible. I knew my place: with abilities and possibilities in this life, forest driving is out of reach. The idea basically is, why would I needed offroad when there are so many roads to choose between? Seemed perfectly logical until some years later, I appeared to be behind the wheel in an old jeep, in the middle of the quarry. I was confused. There were no roads to choose between. There was a lot of snow covering the ground with not any signs of directions whatsoever. There was space, though if that of any comfort. But choices for emply space were kinda out of my level 🙂  ”Where can I drive?” – I asked a guy in another car, – ”can I drive behind you? For I don’t know where I shall drive…” – ”Well… where do you want to get?” – ”Eh… (Alice in Wonderland experience there))) since I almost could see the answer) …I don’t know.” – ”Well then drive wherever you want.

At that point, with every braincell screaming: the barriers of logic are usually broken painfully,  the road stopped being a matter of multiple choice for me, and became a philosophical issue.

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The path is never an obstacle in itself ) the lack of tools and friends is. 

A psychoterapeut is a lovely thing but speak out is so much chaper

Five hours before midnight on New Year’s eve I am running all dressed up and with high heels in a purse in one hand, and a chocolate cake in another – we are on the way to the party! Coming right up to see my car – for the first time ever! – with a flat tire.  Oh I’ve seen and had cars broken for me a number of times of course, but usually I was also the reason for that, too. This came of out nowhere…
Sayng hello in the local workshop for a fix of flat tire on the first day after the new year’s weekend – what a start of the year! But after a closer examination it suddenly turned into a panic search for a set of new ones – and within the price I can afford, it is not an easy task in the middle of Ice Age in Skåne. As the day ends, with no result. Driving to work early tomorrow will be a RR (russian roulette, but the abbreviation sounds so much closer to how I feel))) experience… Coming home tired and concerned, I stand unusually comfortable on a soft floor by the sink in the kitchen… Unusually soft…. look closer down and see a little puddle of water. Oh… that’s why. The diswasher has broken. 
…Sometimes I get an aspiration to stand in the middle of everything and scream into the middle of nowhere: GIVE ME A BREAK would you???
Then I think (which often ruins everything 🙂 but still). Hm… All the small misfortunes I had over last couple of months were about the flow: things were leaking, dropping, clogged och stuck. If assume that there are no coincidents, this might mean I have a suppressed issue that needs reconciliation, or a conflict that stops my development…. blah blah. Ah, I need some expert help on that one. Maybe a shrink. Or a fortune teller.
Then I remember the eventual bill for the new set of tires and the shrink gets itself a worthy alternative: you know all these letters that whould be good to finaly send some time? All opinions to finally say outloud? Here you go 🙂 lean back and watch the flow 🙂
I’ll get to you, my dear flat tire, and my dearest dishwasher, I’ll get to you later…

Julmys, umgås och övning: nyfikna på tango är hjärtligt välkomna!

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Vi är nu klara med vår första någonsin nybörjarkurs 🙂 Tjohooo! Nu laddar vi för en serie av workshops i januari/februari, som vår fortsättningskurs ska se ut. Mer info om den kommer inom kort.

Som alltid, finns det en del saker man skulle vilja friska upp i minnet, och det finns också några vänner och bekanta som blev lite nyfikna på tango 😉
Så, för att dra ihop säcken för året, bjuder vi alla våra vänner – och deras nyfikna vänner,  till en (ännu) mindre formell miljö, för att prova på tango, öva på grundsteg (tja, vad är grunden för er får ni själva avgöra ))) hem till föreningens säte på Parkgatan 12 i Ekeby (a.k.a. hem till Tania :)). Det är alltså ingen undervisning men tillsammans ska vi hjälpas åt att få fram dem känslor, rörelser och attityder som man kan sedan fortsätta utveckla och bygga på. Lördagar 5 och 19 samt söndagar 13 och 20 kl. 11.00 – 14.00 med lunch. Barn är hjärtligt välkomna! Vi håller oss till våra vanliga självkostnadsprincipen 🙂 OBS: berätta att ni kommer senast dagen innan, till 0761 665626 – det är trevligt av olika anledningar. Tack! /T

There are no borders on heaven: second day at North Cape (time to go home)).

It was my second morning at North Cape and I felt my inner tachometer was showing less and less rounds per minute. Maybe I should consider going home before I liked this new state of mine too much…

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Yes I did have food with me, to enjoy a misty cold breakfast by the car, watching the tourists come and go. So a fresh baked waffle with northern sour cream and brown cheese, as well as fresh brewed coffee, was not a neccessity at all. But it was a cosy morning with a view. Breakfast at Tiffany wouldn’t do much better 🙂

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where’s everybody? are langoliers coming???

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It was a single solitary journey until I got a company: then the weather changed as well. I had to face the fact that there was no guarantee for any better weather an hour later today, or tomorrow, or any other day that week. So any hour tomorrow, or today, was just as good to start moving.

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Seeing a sign like that you do wonder if they mean the road will go up and down or right and left.

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Apparently, both. Hm… speaking of efficient communication 🙂

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It must be a local treat – or bus drivers driving test: no side shields or poles on sharp turns in the mountains. And: 70 km/h. Do they mean slow down? no shtting?

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Starting to appreciate the tunnels as a dark place with no rain.

Diffuse light gave each detail onthe road its specific glow :)

Diffuse light gave each detail onthe road its specific glow 🙂

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go with the flow 🙂 No you don’t fall asleep on the road like this, no )) but a bit mesmerized, you can.

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Why would they even bother having speed limit signs? Campers do the job much more organized and effective… They are everywhere!!!

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Yeah I should look more on the road. But it happens so much more in the sky!

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Grey everything: welcome to the white, I mean grey, silence; what a wonderful background for thoughts!

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There is a mountain and a cloud ahead  of me. And from my point of view, or my current objecives, they are pretty equal… looks similar! My point is, you can’t talk about the equality unless you tried to climb the issues to compare.

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I got a hitchhiker as a company! So now there is somebody to take a picture of me, too! As if there was not enough with selfies already…

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We lost the second car though… Well well. The we need some fresh water and some warm water to the thermos anyway.

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…and when I think about it a little bit longer, I feel I am a little bit hungry, too… Featuring my favourite souvenir from the giftshop: this blue jacket hopefully got its new owner when I lost it by the swimming pool in Lund a month later.

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Café de la sierra 🙂

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Northern coastline jazz 🙂 Rythm on the ground, melody in the sky

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What do you have a life for? This old guy, after he lost his wife, took his tractor, hooked a camper to it, and travelled from his home in Southern Germany here, to the North Cape. Doing about 20 km/day, it only took him 2 months to get here. Did he really need to wait until his wife passed away to do this???

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This is the entrance to the Saami (Laplands) silversmith store. You never can tell…

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A price tag looks a bit off here 🙂 but well, it could be a nice souvenir 🙂 if you like fishing!

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Patterns I learnt to recognize from Alta… dynamic geometry. wonderful 🙂

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🙂 I am supposed to be a buyer but I was sold completely on this one 🙂 the Lappland Sun. This pattern: a start, a swirl & a heart, was following me through the last week and finally I got a name to the face ))) Makes perfect sense!

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Driving beween the mirrors, watch out for endless reflections 😉

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Me and my navigator talking while our passenger is sleeping: ”Ah come on!!! You can actually drive 80 here! Look at this road! What scary? Don’t look on the road then, look at me and DRIVE. You’ll never make these 600 km to the next stop unless you ACCELERATE!” Don’t worry, the chance you miss the turn is very little – it’s coming first somewhere after 185 km…”

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A break for coffee and a sandwich. I think the dog was a bit hungry, too…

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the beach feeling 🙂 sand dunes by the warm road and a lake just on the other side of the car

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🙂 Now I am officially closer to home (appr 1900 km) than to the North Pole (appr. 2600).

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not so fast!!! )))

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Okay. I was not that much in a hurry to get home anyway.

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You’ve got to love the journey to appreciate the road 🙂

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… it feels like, if I follow the advice and drive 70, this shy little sign ”sharp turn to the left” won’t do much, nor in time…

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Feel blessed that I don’t have to write this on my home adress-field…

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You wanna rent a bike? Go to Ven or something…

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I hate roll-a-coasters, but what do you do but have fun, when the road seem to have the same intention as a waterfall…

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I couldn’t help the feeling that this ”60” referred least of all to the speed limit…

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We are actually in Finland now. I think. I am not sure since the heaven took over the attention for a long time ago, and there there were no borders for senses or colours.

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…right up to the moment when the sky decided to pay a visit. We were water planning so may times that I was about to get tinitus from the passenger’s screaming )) Full focus on the road, and all went fine. Roll-a-coaster huh…

A half an hour later it was all over. Fresh violet sky and shining road (and we even started to meet other cars…)

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I know where Michelangelo got his inspiration from ))) The models are still there for anyone to follow…

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somewhere under the raindbow..

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Stunning light effects – you need the whole sky to see and appreciate this!

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That was like to be in a vivid conversation that the earth was having with the sky 🙂 very vivid… untainted 🙂 Same as in a couple of persons – same load, but more discrete. I wonder, if we are not too discrete – from each other…

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Saw arrangements like this several times, have no idea what this is about 🙂 Don’t think it scares animals that much: maybe tourists?

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Forest after the storm 🙂 lovely smells, lights and sounds

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I thought is was kittens… As they played on the road. Hello foxy lady?

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Nää we didn’t really need to stop here. And considering the amount of mosquitoes, it was not particularly smart either. It got to be a tough test to the Nordic Summer ointment (tjohooo! it worked!! there were many good words said to and about the fiend of mine who borrowed me this magic for the journey ))) since we couldn’t miss this evening mirror lake.

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my hitchhiker 🙂

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Blues symphony 🙂

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Okay ) I made it to Sweden in one day! Loosing my company – twice in a day; well, I wish all other times in life it would be as simple to see that we have different roads to take…

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I guess this is the last evening I enjoy the midnight sun 🙂

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It was totally worth it 🙂

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Following the Northern lights way… ) wondefull. No borders in the sky – that I have experienced now )))

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Time to look for a camping site… not that easy when the road is narrow and there are no restplaces or parkings or… whatever. That’s when you realize that offroad is not a hobby, it’s a mindset 🙂

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Advanced cooking. Tastes so well with only salt, cummin and pepper that I wonder why on earth I have a whole army of spices at home?

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Here is my dinner, my lunch and a sandwich for a coffee break tomorrow 🙂

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…see the troll in the background? 🙂 It’s time to go to sleep and leave the night in the forest to the forest creatures ))) It’s half past one after all….